This blogpost is difficult for me to write. That may be one of the most honest statements I have ever written. But it's true. I understand the arguments on both sides. I understand why LGBT Americans and their supporters/allies are in opposition to Chick-Fil-A's stance on the Gay Marriage issues. I also understand why Chick-Fil-A has the stance it does and why people are defending it. In my opinion it stems in large part from the tension I feel between my allegiance to the Christian faith and my support of Gay Marriage, love and rights. I have always wondered even as a child what the big deal was about homosexuality in the bible. I am aware of the biblical passages cited to support homosexuality as a sin and It's never been clear to me that this was what the bible actually said. I never found the words "homosexuality is an abomination" in the bible. I know it could be interpreted that way, but I have never found it to be a clear cut case of God's hatred for Gay people. Even assuming that it was sinful, I never understood why this sin was paramount to any other sin-to the extent that we would take away rights or prohibit that activity but not make it unlawful to : lie, fornicate ect...although I am well aware that it was at one time unlawful to fornicate (still on the books in some states e.g. Georgia). Still, if homosexuality is a sin (and I am not entirely convinced that it is), I don't get why pedophiles who obviously hurt children and can themselves procreate with and then marry the mother/father of this child to have legal rights and easy access to this child are given the right to marry. Yet, gay individuals cannot. The shit just doesn't make sense. Most importantly, beyond ambiguous biblical references to homosexuality, one thing the bible makes clear that we are to operate in a spirit of love and tolerance for each other---and he says that this is the greatest commandment of all. So that says to me that hatred is ungodly. Period.
And God gives us all free will, so let people be happy. The end. That is my personal opinion.
I know that spiritually some people are uncomfortable with homosexuality. As a member of the Southern Baptist Church (very conservative) I get that. It's not surprising to me that people who identify with Christian Faith are in opposition to Gay marriage. I also understand it's their constitutional right to be in opposition to that-however awful it makes you feel. And that's why I feel like Chick-Fil-A President did nothing wrong in stating his position on Gay Marriage. I may not agree with that position (and I don't) but I don't think there is anything wrong with his statement.
Now...it's my understanding that the company also donates money to "anti-Gay" organizations. Now that's a horse of a whole different color. Actively donating money to organizations that are against Gay individuals or hate individuals ot me is not Christian. And does not warrant support. If these organizations don't spew hatred but are in opposition to Gay Marriage-then in my opinion, that's a little more gray. But again it's only my personal opinion. If you want to boycott this, then fine. If your want to support Chick-Fil-A-fine. But the petty rubbing your chicken sandwich in people's faces just to be spiteful isn't Christian or humane. Likewise kissing in a christian establishment (regardless of sexual orientation) seems a little inopposite to me as well. And at this point, both sides' message is getting lost in "war". The focus should be on legalizing Gay Marriage...hopefully the social acceptance of it will come after it's legal (nationwide).
Some people may criticize me as operating in some sort of heterosexual privilege. I am self-aware and socially critical enough to admit that....to an extent. But if we're honest., we all operate under some sort of privilege. I mean Tommy Hilfiger made comments about his clothes not being for black people and I'm sure plenty of gay people continued to buy from him. Not because they hate black people, but because they (unless they are both gay and black) operated under other privileges (racial/socio-economic). This is how oppression wins...it interlocks with the other oppressions to keep people from working to end overall oppression. This is successful b/c most people may be oppressed in one way but may be privileged in another. Often people don't fight as hard for the rights of others as they do for their own. Sad, but true.
Now, another pet peeve of mine are the Gay Rights movement vs. Civil Rights movement. They are not comparable. They are separate and they are born out of separate circumstances. Being a descendant of "property" is different from being born gay. Not more or less important but different. The struggle for gay acceptance and equality has it's own legitimacy anyway, it doesn't need to borrow legitimacy from the African American struggle. Gay individuals should be allowed to be themselves, find love and get married, simply because they are humans. It has nothing to do with the American Black Civil Rights Comparison and it's got everything to do with what is right.
However you feel about gay relationships or marriage, we have to operate in a spirit of tolerance and love. You have a right to live your life the way you choose to live it as long as you don't hurt others. I honestly don't see what the harm is. Is it really that big of a deal anymore? Hell, if people want to be in committed monogamous relationships with each other-regardless of orientation- then I am all for it. Maybe that makes me a bad Christian. Maybe that makes me an excellent Christian. I guess I'll let God be the judge of that. I'm not going to make people feel less than, simply because they're gay and if that offends you -I'll live. Why? I don't know any other way to be, but to be me.
Until next time,
~The Maven
3 comments:
I completely agree with everything you said in this blog! Just to let you know, I will borrow some of this for my own personal arguments lol. I have always wondered why homosexuality has seemed to be singled out as a sin that is an abomination, while other sins like adultery, fornication, etc. don't seem to elicit the same amount of strong feelings.
As for Dan Cathy's comments, maybe this isn't "politically correct," but I don't see why people are surprised at the statement he made. I mean Chick-Fil-A is closed on Sundays! For me, my view on this situation would be different if for instance Chick-Fil-A refused to serve people because of their sexual orientation. If people don't agree with what he said and they choose not to spend their money at the restaurant, then that's fine. But don't look at me crazy if I decide to go get a peach milkshake. I just don't think that I'm making a political statement or suggesting that I hate gay people if I eat a chicken sandwich.
As for the organizations that Chick-Fil-A donates to, I'm pretty sure they didn't just start making these donations and people haven't made a big deal about it before. And what about other companies that we patronize? I wonder if people are going to look into what organizations other companies donate money to. I'm just saying.
This is a very well written blog. Legalmaven. I think this is the best one yet!
If you're interested in learning more about biblical perspectives on homosexuality, I highly recommend the book "What the Bible Really Says About Homosexuality," by Daniel Helminiak. His website is here, if you want a description: http://www.visionsofdaniel.net/book3WBRS.htm
Also, I'd just like to add a queer perspective on this. I think that in some ways, you are conflating what is legally allowed with what is morally right. Yes, anyone can say anything they like about another group and for the most part, their right to speech is protected. That does not mean, however, that that speech is moral. I personally believe that espousing views that cause young children to hate themselves or think of themselves as evil and "abominations" is immoral. Any speech that makes children (and adults!) more likely to kill themselves is not responsible speech.
Also, I totally agree with the end bit of your post about how the gay rights movement often appropriates the African American civil rights movement. It is not defensible. It's one thing to say, "we have seen what your group did, and we like your tactics," and entirely another to say, "our struggles--they are the same!"
feminine,
I'm not conflating morality and legal views. I think the first paragraph addressed morality. In terms of Christianity, which is my moral compass and allegedly the compass, I believe to attack others based on your perception of the righteousness of their conduct in contrary to Christian principles.
On the other hand we live in a society where people have strong opinions and those opinions may or may not be the most positive or informed, but that doesn't make it amoral. Saying I don't agree with gay marriage isn't amoral because it leads to decreased self-efficacy. It is not necessarily an attack in my humble opinion to disagree with gay marriage. To work actively to eradicate it or prevent it from happening may be more in line with an attack. Perhaps people should be more aware of the impact of their words but we can't be responsible (within reason) for how others are going to take that. I see nothing morally repugnant about his views although I certainly do not agree.
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